Thursday, January 1, 2015

2014 - A change of seasons

2014 started out looking like it would be the year without change.  I kind of liked that idea.  My husband and I tend to be trail blazers always changing never holding onto anything for too long, but this year that's all I wanted to simply be enjoying my family, my friends, and my happy little job.

5 boys, 1 baby girl, 2 sets of parents.

My youngest was at the best age ever; 4.  Old enough to do pretty much anything, but young enough to live care free.  My oldest was in kindergarten changing right before my eyes.  He was for the first time ever able to correctly pronounce every sound in the English language.  He's a bit tongue tied so it took him longer then most kids, but as we entered 2014 he was doing it.  Our best friends lived with us and I had a job that let me step away from life and serve people just down the road, I called it my happy little world of Broadway.  There I only had to think about refilling drinks and teaching others to do it as well.

Do to what I now understand was a failed communication, I left my job.  Shortly there after side swiped when my grandmother passed.  It's the way of life for Grandparents to go before the grandchildren, but it seemed so quick.  Laughter went to her funeral wearing a sling.  He fell off the bed breaking his collar bone.  Two weeks after his sling came off, his brother broke his arm jumping off of a swing.

Not long after I got a text and then a call wondering if I wanted to run my own store.  If I wanted to take my happy little world of Broadway down the road and run it the way I wanted too.  Strong man and I said yes.  Life began to fly by, I worked insane hours working hard to learn my role as RGM and worked hard at keeping up with one of the busiest months.  I began mourning the loss of what I knew of motherhood, fishing trips, doctors appointments, reading and writing together, holding the boys close when they were sick, doing special projects together on rainy days, even the mundane of the day in and day out constantly going over the same things with the boys.

Days before Strong man's 33rd birthday we sat in the ER wondering just how serious his sickness was.  As we waited we imagined what life would be like without each other, thankful for all that we had.

I'm still not sure what 2014 truly was all about.
Maybe it was simply a reminder that life never stands still that you have to fight to savor it.
Maybe it was a reminder to fight for the relationships close to you.
Maybe it was to show me how fragile life really is, to value what is most important in it.
Maybe it was a warning of the changes to come.
Maybe it's a little of all the above.

This year will stand out above most others,   No matter what it was about I hope that as I enter 2015 I can discern what needs to be a priority and what I should let go of, that I can focus on the most important aspects and move quickly past the insignificant things.

With all my heart I have sought You; 
Do not let me wander from Your commandments.
~ King David