TEN. YEARS. OLD.

To my curly haired, freckled faced Man of the woods,

Ten.  Double digits man, double digits.  Crazy how time flies.  It seems like just yesterday you were the strong willed little boy with a sweet lisp who prayed everyday for freckles.  Now you're 10.  It blows my mind.  You blow my mind.

You're everything I imagined and so much more.  My favorite is the way you love people. For example this year on your tenth birthday there is a dinner for the Cub Scout leaders.  I really don't want to go, I want to be with you.  But you keep insisting that I go.  You tell me I deserve it and that I work hard for you.  After two weeks of talking about it, I finally agreed.  The first birthday where I won't be with you from the time you wake until the time you go to bed.  The beginning of you becoming a man.  I am proud to be called your mom.

This has been a year full of change.  I think you're character has shined through.  The way you love the children that come and go from our home.  The way you grieve for them, and get excited about their wins.  The way you explain why you choose to do what's right.  The way you ask questions that go straight to the heart of the matter.  I wish you could see yourself through my eyes.  I wish I had words for you to know just how loved you are.

My prayer for you this year is that you take what you know is right and true and practice living it.  The more you do it the easier it will become.  Then you will be ready to do it even when it's not what you want to do, because sometimes that's what life requires to do what's right even when it's hard.

An interview with your ten year old self:
What's your favorite color? Blue, dark blue.

What's something that is very special to you? My bike and you guys, and the babe.
What's your favorite saying? Hey bro
What's your favorite thing to do? Bike

What's your favorite memory from this past year? Camping with my Dad.
What do you want to be when you grow up? I have no clue. Game Warden, but do I really have to decide so soon?

Thank you sweet boy for teaching me to be a Momma.  I love you more.

Nine

To the one who birthed me into motherhood and has held my heart close for the last nine years, I adore you.  Over these last few weeks we've been on an adventure of a lifetime, discovering the land of our ancestors, the land of the rising sun.  I've marveled at how much of a man you are becoming.  You are after all half way to 18, half grown, but sometimes I forget that your hands are almost as big as mine.  On this trip you wouldn't let me forget.  You were respectful always and thought constantly about other people.  It made me smile, seeing you pay attention to the details, even in such a strange place, remembering what you've been taught.  I love that about you, how detailed you are.

You asked to go to the zoo and so we did.  It was a very fun day.

You are named Man of the Woods and live up to that name so well.  We were in Japan at the busiest time of year for them during the 'Golden Week', an entire week of holidays.  We saw the Imperial Palace, and giant statues of Buddha, we went up to the top of the tallest tower in the world, we saw kites that were the size of a standard room, but your favorite part of the whole trip was the few hours we spent at the Pacific Ocean.  It's the natural and the simple that bring you the most joy.  I hope you never grown out of that.

At the Pacific Ocean.

Over the last 12 days I got to glimpse the man you are becoming.  You walked like a man, never needing to hold my hand.  Even though the places we visited were shoulder to shoulder packed, you never needed the security of it.  You ate everything I put on your plate and asked to try what wasn't initially offered to you.  You remembered all your manners.  I realized that, in our small town, it's good to always expect you to let grown ups go first, but when in a busy train station, I needed to let you know it was okay to cut in front of them sometimes.  I'm proud of the glimpse I saw.  You're going to be a good man full of respect for others.

You are a pro with chopsticks.  Every meal we used them and you conquered them.

This coming year you are going to enter the fourth grade and I suspect will continue to do Cub Scouts.  I bet you'll keep fiddling around with your uke making music just for fun. Lego's will be your favorite past time as they have been this year.  As you're Momma I'll pray that you keep making good choices.  I'll focus on teaching you more of the why it's important to do what's right.  We'll keep plugging away at your reading skills and you'll keep blowing my mind with your math smarts.

My prayer for you this year is this: May you stay strong and learn to focus especially on the things that bore you such as school work.  May you use the knowledge you have in a wise way.  May you always put others first for the sake of love.  May you continue to be your unique self, loving life to it's fullest and constantly wanting to learn.

You are proud of this photo you took of Mount Fuji.  It's the one photo you insist everybody sees.

I love you more than life.  There are no words to tell you how proud I am of the man you are becoming. Here's an interview with your nine year old self.

What is your favorite color? Dark Blue

What is something very special to you? God

What is your favorite word or saying? "Guess what, in Minecraft..."

What is your favorite thing to do? Climb, run, and play outside.

What is your favorite memory from this past year? Japan, all of it.

What do you want to be when you grow up? I don't know

You started this whole journey and I kind of love it this way.

Dearest Man of the Woods,

About six months ago you walked into the living room to have a deep conversation with me.  I'm not sure why you were thinking about it, but it's been life changing for me.  It was short and you were to the point.  I wanted to share it with you because your words went straight to my heart.  Here it is:

You: Mom, there are kids that don't have parents to love them right?
Me: Yes that's true.
You: But you're a good mom and Dad is a good dad so why don't you love them?
Me: Wow I don't have a good answer.  That's a very deep thought.  I'll think about it.

You see since your brother was a little over one I have wanted a daughter.  As you know my pregnancies were hard so your Dad and I decided not to have any more children.  We had talked about adopting.  I had even done research into it, but the cost of a private adoption is more then we can afford.  I had just decided that some dreams weren't meant to be.  The only thing we hadn't looked into was adoption through the state.  Dad was open to foster care, but I had always been against it.  That is until you and I had this conversation.

Your opinion means a lot to me so when you suggested that I loved you well and should share some of that love with another child.  It made me stop and question my motives, why if I was so open to a private adoption I wouldn't be open to an adoption through the state.  After a few months of thinking and praying it over I decided you were right.  Now six months after you and I had this conversation I don't just think this is a good idea I'm over joyed at the idea.

Thank you for asking questions and giving me your thoughts on life.  You are a good man with a good heart.  I'm looking forward to walking this road with you where ever it takes us.  I love you my son.

Seven

My dear man of the woods,

Today we share Mothers day and your birthday.  Your first birthday was the last time this happened.  The sun was shining and the day was glorious, we hiked through the woods following the river where we would stop and let you play in the puddles along the way.

This year we're having a cook out with lots of friends full of games and fun.  I can't believe how much you've grown from that day when you were barely walking to now where you literally climb the walls.  I am proud of the boy you are, and my heart overflows with love for you, my first born son.

Mile stones:
~ You broke your arm jumping off the swing in early summer.  There wasn't much playing in the water or fishing, but still it was a good summer and you had a great attitude.

~ Still by the end of the summer you were riding a bike without training wheals, flying up and down the driveway.
~ You lost your first two teeth.
~ You flew through first grade reading books like Sam I am, and Put me in the zoo.

An interview with seven year old you:
What is your favorite color?  Green
What is something that is very special to you?  God
What is your favorite word or saying?  I don't know, but I really like whistling.

What is your favorite thing to do?  Either climb walls or bike.
Who is your favorite super hero?  Forest Lord... The hero I was last year at Kids Fest.
What is your favorite memory of this past year?  Catching my big trout on my birthday last year.
When you grow up what do you want to be?  A trapper.

My prayer for you this year is this...I pray that you learn to turn your knowledge into wisdom.  That you do what is right because you want to not because it is what we ask of you.  I pray that this is a year full of health.  I pray you learn to see the Creator in all of life, and that you love Him deeply.

Every time I look at you I remember how much God loves me.  You are everything I asked for and so much more.  You are one of the greatest gifts I will ever be given.  I love you my son.

And those who know Your name will put their trust in You, for You, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.

~ Psalm 9;10

The first of many.

This 6 almost 7 year old boy lost his first tooth.

About half way through breakfast he noticed that his mouth was bleeding.  He tried and tried to pull that tooth out but it wouldn't come.

Then we had a date just the two of us and when he was eating his snack it began to bleed again.  Just after dinner he asked me to pull it out.  His initial reaction was, "Did you do it? Did it come out?"

A moment that needs to be remembered.

The love of an older brother

It was almost tomorrow and I had just gotten home from work when his curls shock with trembling, and big slow tears ran down his face as he tried to keep calm, "Daddy.  Laughter's missing.  I got up to go pee and checked on him and he's missing.  There's just his head nothing else left."

While Strong man promised to check on Little Brother, this sweet boy climbed into my lap burying his face in my neck as I rubbed his back as I assured him all was well.  Myself holding back tears as I shared his pain, while fighting back the laughter of joy I had in his deep love of his brother.

Sweet boy of six years old,  I am proud to be your mother, I am proud of the man you are so quickly becoming.  keep on loving like you do.

231.  A love that runs deep, something only brothers know.
232.  Sitting with my boy curled in my lap, being able to bring comfort to his soul just as I did when he was small.  A fleeting gift.
233.  Healthy boys.

First week of school

September 2nd kicked off our school year.  As much as I love the camera I am not one of those totally on top of it mothers who has a cute little sign marking the first day of school and what grade there child is entering.  I kind of wish I was, but am still proud of myself for at least marking the first day of kindergarten, which after all is the life changing childhood moment.  From that day on the child will forever have some kind of responsibility, it begins with the ABC's, but ends with a job to support themselves.  Yes I am proud of myself for capturing that moment, but really is the first day of first grade that life changing.  I don't think so...or at least that's what I tell myself to stave off the guilt of forgetting to take a picture marking the beginning of a new school year...

Kindergarten photo.

This year looks entirely different from last year because we are officially a homeschooling family.  Man of the woods in first grade and now Laughter is going through a preschool program his brother and I did a few years back.

In our school we drink coffee, sit at the kitchen table, and listen to instrumental music while we learn.

After two days we're still alive, and even still like each other.  Even more importantly each of the boys seemed to have retained what I taught them.  Here's to a great school year!...I hope...

Does an over-the-shoulder-day-before-school-starts photo count as a first day photo?

A date with my Man of the woods.

Thanks to a hearing exam Man of the woods and I were able to have us a little date.

We talked and laughed.  He laughed hardest when my seltzer water exploded in the waiting room.
We shopped together and had dinner together at our favorite Chinese restaurant.  Chinese food is his favorite, even though he only ever eats southern fried chicken, french fries, and fruit.

A simple but fun night out with my favorite six year old.

Six

Dearest Si,

You are the easiest boy to plan a party for.  All you wanted was your family, a store bought whoopie pie cake, and some fishing.  That's how you are though.  You always have a short list of wants and being with those you love is always on it.  I love that about you.

So you're six as of two days ago.  It kind of blows my mind.

This year you:
~ Started kindergarten.
~ learned to read & write.
~ Almost always get perfect scores on your spelling tests and memory verses.
~ Learned how to ride your bike this past year.
~ Learned how to buckle yourself up with an over the shoulder strap.
~ Learned how to catch and release mice.
~ Fell more in love with critters, fishing, & the outdoors.
~ Learned when to be tough and when tears are right.
~ Do things for and with your brother because you know it will make him feel loved even though I know you really don't want to. - I'm so proud of you for that.
~ Love God more then you did last year.
~ You have a hunger to learn, about God, about life, about academics.

It has been a treasure watching you grow one more year older, becoming your own person.  I'm am just as overjoyed that I get to be your Momma as the day I birthed you.

An interview with your six year old self:
What is your favorite color? Camo
What is something special to you?  My magical's, the pull apart super heros.
What is your food?  Chicken nuggets and whoopie pie.
What is your favorite memory from this past year? That walk in the city forest with just Dad.

Gifts
110.  You're healthy.
111.  You make smart choices.
112.  You want the right kind of things such as people over possessions.
113.  Your love for the out doors.
114.  The simple things that bring you joy.
115.  Your freckles.
116.  How quickly you learn new things.