Thursday, April 13, 2017

You started this whole journey and I kind of love it this way.

Dearest Man of the Woods,

About six months ago you walked into the living room to have a deep conversation with me.  I'm not sure why you were thinking about it, but it's been life changing for me.  It was short and you were to the point.  I wanted to share it with you because your words went straight to my heart.  Here it is:

You: Mom, there are kids that don't have parents to love them right?
Me: Yes that's true.
You: But you're a good mom and Dad is a good dad so why don't you love them?
Me: Wow I don't have a good answer.  That's a very deep thought.  I'll think about it.

You see since your brother was a little over one I have wanted a daughter.  As you know my pregnancies were hard so your Dad and I decided not to have any more children.  We had talked about adopting.  I had even done research into it, but the cost of a private adoption is more then we can afford.  I had just decided that some dreams weren't meant to be.  The only thing we hadn't looked into was adoption through the state.  Dad was open to foster care, but I had always been against it.  That is until you and I had this conversation.

Your opinion means a lot to me so when you suggested that I loved you well and should share some of that love with another child.  It made me stop and question my motives, why if I was so open to a private adoption I wouldn't be open to an adoption through the state.  After a few months of thinking and praying it over I decided you were right.  Now six months after you and I had this conversation I don't just think this is a good idea I'm over joyed at the idea.

Thank you for asking questions and giving me your thoughts on life.  You are a good man with a good heart.  I'm looking forward to walking this road with you where ever it takes us.  I love you my son.

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