Monday, June 13, 2016

One family different people

Each of us has our own story.  No matter how alike our stories may be they will never be the same.  Our boys only 18 months apart who are best friends and just a few years into life have very different stories.

One boy took 29 hours to come into this world and then lived 8 months in pain because of an unknown allergy, he was tongue tied so spoke with his own personal pronunciation of any words that included the "Th" and "Sh" combinations well into late kindergarten.  He was able to ride a bike without training wheels when he was five and began rollerblading a month or two later.  He sees patterns in everything.  He remembers things in exacting detail.  He hates reading.  He is very literal.  He has a very black and white view of life.  He loves the outdoors and anything that goes along with it, and is very much looking forward to giving Boy Scouts a try this coming fall.

Boy number two took 8 hours total, but only 30 minutes at the hospital with only four pushes, and his milk allergy was expected so he never knew that same pain as his brother.  He is six in a half and still can't ride a bike without training wheels.  He just learned to roller blade.  Reading is easy for him.  He remembers the big idea, but doesn't seem to care about the details.  He is full of endless hugs and loves to hold my hand.  He is not even remotely interested in being a Boy Scout but really wants to learn to play the ukulele.

Brothers who share DNA, up until last night the same room and almost all of the same events each day throws at them.  Yet they walk through life with very different eyes.  Eyes that filter the experiences differently.  Sometimes it can make situations a bit uncomfortable and sometimes it can even cause conflict.

As there Mom it's fun to watch them experience life.  Not only am I able to experience our life from my perspective I get to watch it through eyes as well.  From the outside I'm able to see that often they both are correct in there interpretation of life.  The conflict comes from being unwilling to allow the other brother the freedom of being different.

This conflict of there's is what has been changing my perspective of relationships and what makes each of us who we are.  I've been learning not only to value of the perspective of somebody else, but to know that we both might be right.  In turn I'm okay with uncomfortable conversations and even a little bit of conflict.  Life experience and conflict form our convictions.  Conviction is what makes us tick.

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